By Our Reporter
We are in an era of community Journalism and public opinions where everyone assumes that they have a right to every matter that comes their way.
Initially, I had been trapped by the uncoordinated noise ingrained with prejudice and ignorance directed towards a one “Pastor” Bugingo and Susan Makula.
Well! I should put it on record that my worst experience in life was the day I halted my own relationship with the mother of my daughter.
People judged us the way they felt like and I chose never to explain myself to anyone except that person whom we shared everything except brains.
It’s an open secret that marriage can literally become a stinking open grave that can swallow both parties if not properly dealt with.
It’s Bugingo who personally understands whatever happened inside his house and that could be the push factor to whatever he chose to do.
Vows talk about a lifetime together, a life of unwavering loyalty, one of getting old together, through good and bad times. But as years pass by, that spurt of love turns into hell.
I’m not a (mulokole) to start acting like Jesus is my sibling, but I must tell everyone around me that it is our responsibility to be happy on earth as we wait for life in our unknown destination (Heaven).
Bugingo did no crime to seek happiness other than living a pretentious life in the name of God and his son Jesus who presumably wish us happiness.
It’s on record that many killings and other crimes have happened between persons who live together in the name of “for better for worse.
I’m not trying to judge or support anyone at the expense of the other, but truth is that the world would be a better place if we all choose peace.
The peace that we preach in communities and places of worship, must start in our homes. I don’t believe that it would be great for a couple to live a pretentious life to appease God and the naysayers who are never victims of what happens between “lovers”.
I avoid indulging Suzan Makula in my talk because she has already been wrongly judged. There is person reading my opinion who is already asserting that Makula lured the “pastor”.
Truth of the matter is that we get spouses from churches, our places of work and our communities. It would indeed sound a bizzare if Bugingo picked a spouse from a shrine.
All in all, the young woman is a consented adult who was convinced by another adult and she accepted. It’s silly for us to assume that she did wrong to accept a man who promised to protect her.
All we need to know.
If Bugingo and Makula have annoyed you, don’t act like as if you are Gods’ personal assistant to start judging them. Simply , ask God to intervene in their relationship other than acting like a sorcerer.
If Bugingo died in a pretentious marriage, we would all blame him for not walking away.
Had it been Teddy (Bujingo) who had walked away, the public would have supported her just like you did for Ann Kansiime, Rema Namakula, Ruth Komuntale, Late Princess Diana and many others. And actually this is mean towards men who equally suffer just like women.
Bugingo had an option to build a network of extra marital affairs but he chose peace and I believe that is a responsible move from an adult.
Where did Bugingo go wrong?
The disgruntled “man of God” had no moral authority to “undress” then vulnerable mother (Teddy) on the pulpit and on other public platforms.
Right! Teddy nearly did the same but ideally we expected better from Bugingo who nearly failed to control his emotions.
Reminding us how the lady grappled with severe “Fistula” was the most irresponsible move that was taken by an adult who has a moral right to protect the diginity of any woman . ( And I think Bujingo should have apologized for his sensiless utterances).
In just a similar queue, Teddy (Bugingo) acted funny when she chose to lias with Bugingo’s rival ministries to rally for support. Ideally, with church fights known to everyone, such a move would be an opportunity to threaten Bujingo’s hard built ministry.
Above all, Teddy (Bugingo) should have wiped her “jolly” tears to let the man go for the benefit of both parties.
One of the most obvious indicators that love is gone is the feeling of contentment or relief when your partner is absent. This is vivid in Bugingo’s life.
Divorce or not, Bugingo found peace.
Wedding rings don’t directly have any historical religious significance though there are many modern spiritual interpretations to their usage.
Historians believe that wedding ring originated from very old Roman traditions, prior to Christianity. During the 1st century, it was very common place for the rich and wealthy to wear multiple rings to show their status and rank in society.
My point is that with or without a ring, anyone can marry . It is not a crime to buy a ring and put it on anyone.
Even when their marriage is not legalized, there is no single law that stops Bugingo and Makula from living a happy life, sleeping in the same house, having sex and producing children.
Rings, weddings and laws are things to do with inheritance as concocted by the yester year’s feudal England during the medieval period.
The law and marriage.
In Uganda, the marriageable age under the Marriage Act is 21 years and above, any person under the age of 18 is considered a minor with no capacity to contract a marriage.
Article 31(1) of the Constitution of Uganda provides that ‘(a) man and a woman are entitled to marry only if they are each of the age of eighteen years and above and are entitled at that age (a) to find a family; and; (b) to equal rights at and in marriage, during marriage, and at its dissolution.
Ugandan law does not recognise as married, parties who hold themselves out to the world as husband and wife but many people live life like that and they are happy.
Marriage must be contracted in one of the prescribed forms; Church marriage, Mohamedan, Hindu, Civil or Customary. However, the same law doesn’t stop anyone from happily relating with men or Women they like.
Bugingo is committing adultery.. but it’s silly anyway.
According to the Penal Code Article 154, any man who commits adultery ( try to read the act further) may be imprisoned for 12 months and be required to pay a fine of 200 shillings ( Nusu bibiri).
We all need to understand that Bugingo’s saga is still subject to divorce which was already filed. (Though the other party has adamantly refused to accept).
The divorce act insists that a husband or wife may apply by petition to the court for a judicial separation on the ground of cruelty, adultery, or desertion.
Much as I would have loved to see Teddy and Bugingo stay together, their relationship is openly a tell tale of irreconcilable desertion and the man clearly moved on.
All in all, we are all human beings. This precedent should help us understand that marriage is beyond sex, properties etc. The ultimate goal is happiness and love.
Let’s learn that if it fails, we should always let it go as soon as we can so that we don’t hurt the children and the public.
If you assume that marriage is a permit to stress others, your husband could be someone’s future husband and the reverse is true.
Wama Bugingo, eat your Makula in peace and find solace in your heart to forgive the children and your wife.
Gabriel Buule is a Journalist and Public Relations Manager.